Writing 1 Draft

 

ENG 102

1-25-12

 

The article ‘Where Have the Good Men Gone’ should be placed in your book under the second chapter; Poorly made arguments.  The arguments made in the article were not fully convincing and they are also not made in a good manner.  The author uses Ethos and Pathos, but Logos in her argument is hardly able to be found.  In order to fully be able to write a knowledgeable and believable the author must incorporate all three (Ethos, Logos, Pathos) into his/her argument. 

The article has a point that all men in their twenties are now in a state of life that she calls ‘Pre-Adulthood’.  The author explains that before, more men were married by the age of 25 than in today’s society.  Her definition of pre-adulthood is none the nice.  She says that men who once brought home flowers to a wife, are now bringing home chips and beer to their band mates in a flat.  Then, she mentions how women are now beginning to climb even higher, and closer to the men, on the ladder of success.  Now, more women are graduating, getting higher GPA’s, and even earning more than the men in their lives.  She states many facts, and in the middle switches to how and why the men are entering this state. 

Now, the author states that men that are in this ‘Pre-Adulthood’ are unpredictable, and writing their own stories, which is a major change from the men in earlier generations.  Before, men were settling down with women and making families before 30.  And now, the author says men are just starting to consider marriage by 30.  All in all, she makes an overall point leading to her thesis, that this new found ‘Pre-Adulthood’ might not be the best thing for society and for men in general.

In her fist couple of paragraphs the author starts by saying the men in today’s society, who are in their twenties, are now experiencing a ‘pre-adulthood’ part of their lives, which differs from previous generations.  Along with this she states many statistics, but all of them are just dealing with GPA’s and the percent of married men now as compared to in 1970.  The amount of emotional appeal in the first half of her article is impressive, but it lacks any logic.   To be more specific, much of the article had logical fallacies.  Once, when the author was expressing that all men are now among this new breed, and all of them are generically the same.  But, no actual surveys were quoted to back up these statements.

The author goes further into detail by saying that this new era of men has already been happening around the world, and we are just playing social catch-up.  But, if this is so, then where is the evidence to make this a sound judgment.

Continuing to go down the article more you are able to see the mention of women and the changes they have come upon in the more recent decades.  She says that women are now doing better in school than men, as well as earning more.  But, she also says that it is the man’s own fault that they are not as ‘empowered’ as they once were.    Emotionally, for women this sticks.  But, for men, it is about as clear as mud. 

The topic of the essay was how men today are not up to the standards of the men before.  So, when deeming the men of today as ‘children’ in men’s bodies and saying that they are the ones who need to change.  I don’t believe that that will necessarily help her call to action.  Men, in character, do not like to be told what to do directly.  But, in subtle ways of encouragement are able to be persuaded in to being what is proper.

Throughout the paper, the author gives many appeals, but most do not translate in the ways I believe she intended.  The article does indeed have a strong argument in it, but it does not translate within the way this author chose to write.  This article should therefore be published in Chapter Two: Poorly written essays.